Ben Simmons: The Second Coming Of Kobe Bryant

Ben Simmons may be the heir apparent to Kobe Bryant–but not because of his hoops skills.

The John R. Wooden Award is one of the highest honors of college basketball. It rewards the most outstanding all-around player each year. The 2016 nominees, which were revealed during this year’s NCAA basketball tournament, contained a stellar list of the usual suspects–except one.

LSU standout and projected No. 1 draft pick Ben Simmons was not on the final ballot of nominations for the award because–wait for it–he was academically ineligible.

The Wooden Award is the only postseason sports award that requires an academic component, which is maintenance of a 2.0 GPA since enrolling in a college or university.

Turns out Simmons hadn’t been to class all semester–and didn’t much care. At the time that the academic issue was reported, the LSU Tigers were still in the March Madness hunt.

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When asked about his ineligibility for the award–and while the media clutched their collective pearls about his absenteeism nonchalance–Simmons told Glenn Guilbeau of USA Today Sports:

"“I think it was just little things like missing a couple of classes and things like that. And then it gets brought up. If it was somebody else, it may not have been brought up. Now, it’s one of those things that’s everywhere. But I’m not worried about that right now.”"

Bless his heart.

Fast forward a month or so later. The Tigers failed to qualify for the NCAA tournament and refused to play in any other postseason events. Simmons did what everyone figured and declared for the NBA draft as a one-and-done-er.

He then signed with Klutch Sports, the agency fronted by Rich Paul, LeBron James‘ own agent and childhood friend. To make sure that Simmons joined the Klutch family, Paul et al hired his sister, Emily Bush, in their marketing department prior to Simmons’ signing.

Not that Simmons’ personal relationship with James wouldn’t have been enough insurance.

Most recently, reports have surfaced that Simmons–who is on the cusp of a lucrative shoe deal–is now sitting on the offers from adidas and Nike because he wants to see where he actually falls in the draft and use that position to leverage more Tubmans–or, ha ha, Benjamins.

The attitude. The insouciance. The not giving a flying fig about anything but Ben Simmons … sound familiar?

Let us revisit one Kobe Bean Bryant, The Black Mamba, First Of His Name (and First Of His Game), Giver of No Damns, Ruler of Lakerland and California of the South, Warden of the House of Buss, Alighter of Helicopters, Scorer of 81 points in a game, Bearer of Five Rings, Disciple of The Triangle.

Bryant was infamous throughout the league for his win-first mentality and all-around assholery.

This was evidenced by the controversial decision by the Los Angeles Lakers to give him a two-year, $48.5 million extension that lasted through this season, when he finally hung up his Nikes.

This deal was basically payment for services rendered–and the Lakers admitted such–and not a reflection of Kobe’s drastic, injury-ridden decline in play.

The Philadelphia 76ers won the rights to the No. 1 draft pick in the NBA lottery, a move which is allegedly pleasing to the Simmons/Klutch camp. Sixers head coach Brett Brown has ties to Simmons’ family from his coaching stint in Australia.

Still, it seems that Simmons’ personality would be far better served in La-La Land (the Lakers won the No. 2 pick and, while projections are that Simmons will be No. 1, there is still a battle between him and Duke University’s Brandon Ingram for the top draft spot).

The Lakers came under fire last season when their failed pitch to then-free agent LaMarcus Aldridge was heavy on the business and endorsement opportunities available by dint of being a Laker, as opposed to actual basketball plans.

Aldridge went on to eventually sign with the San Antonio Spurs, who made it to the semifinals in this year’s playoffs before being ousted in Game 6 by the Oklahoma City Thunder.

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While Aldridge was, like most players looking for a championship ring, more focused on how his game could grow with a new team (which would only help him get that hardware), there are others who would be completely sold on the Lakers’ reliance on their history of glitz and glamour–and championships, though those days are fading fast.

Which is why Simmons would be more of a natural fit in Los Angeles.

We already know how Simmons looks in purple and gold, since those are the school colors of LSU. While Klutch Sports has some NBA clients playing in larger media markets, only one–New York–is comparable to Los Angeles.

Getting a foothold in such a coveted market so this would be a boon for the business. With Kobe gone, the Lakers need a big name–and a big personality–to try and fill the Mamba’s shoes (good luck with that).

Simmons would be a rookie, but he is one of the more highly touted in this year’s draft. And, as we have seen, personality (for good or ill) will get you far in Lakerland, even with limited talent (hi, NIck Young).

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As for D’Angelo Russell … well, he hasn’t gotten the hang of notoriety quite yet, even for Los Angeles. And he’s not shiny enough to appease the star-studded courtside ticket holders of the Staples Center.

Simmons is under the mentorship of perhaps the most power-hungry, attention-whorish player in the league (now that Kobe is gone).

James will teach Simmons about maximizing off-court opportunities and parlaying that into other random areas, and about seizing power (if Simmons decides he’s about that life). Indeed, since James is attached to Space Jam 2, chances are he’ll be spending a lot of time in Los Angeles.

It would be cool if he could check on Simmons while there.

Simmons, by all accounts, is a decent, 19-year-old kid. He hasn’t yet risen to Kobe ranks with (lack of) regard to dealing with other people.

But he didn’t even go through the Draft Combine, and he’s already exhibiting behavior comparable to a highly paid veteran, which includes allegedly filming a documentary of himself since high school. So Hollywood (Each one, teach one, right, LeBron?).

Simmons’ game is far from polished, and there have been concerns about his defensive ability and tendency to pass up scoring opportunities, which may or may not be to a faulty jump shot.

But new Lakers head coach Luke Walton could mold such raw talent into something formidable–he helped do it every day while an assistant coach with the Golden State Warriors, though to keep it real, those players were mostly veterans who were much further along than Simmons.

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Like any quality jewel, Simmons can shine the brightest if he’s in the proper setting. The Lakers may be that setting for him. Let’s hope they parlay their draft pick into calling Simmons’ name.

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